How to Run a Mile
Rev. Mark Stringer
First Unitarian Church of Des Moines
2/21/09 & 2/22/09

 

“The peak of the mountain is not too high and the bottom of the ocean is not too deep as long as you have exertion.”—Tibetan saying

 

Call to Gather

Out of the 168 hours of each week,

This is one hour that we set aside

To celebrate our living

To remind ourselves to be grateful and generous

To challenge ourselves to expand our horizons and grow our souls.

We do this through the spoken word,
through the sharing of silence,

through the gift of music,

through the recognition of our shared presence
on this spinning blue green ball that is our home.

This is one hour that we intentionally set aside

To encourage each other to fully inhabit our lives,

To embrace the possibilities of our common humanity.

To revive our spirits and renew our commitments.

This is one hour that we set aside…to be together.

And it is good.

 

Sharing a Story

The Tortoise and the Hare, Revisited by Mark Stringer

Once upon a time a tortoise and a hare had an argument about who was faster.  The tortoise knew his short stubby legs were no match for the hare’s long, springy legs, but he couldn’t keep from boldly claiming he might be able to keep up with him in a race.  The hare thought this was all very funny and offered to settle the argument with a competition.  They would race down a long, winding path through the forest towards the nearby pond. The tortoise agreed, despite himself. 

From the moment the race began, the hare shot ahead and ran briskly. Then seeing that he was far ahead of the tortoise, he thought he'd sit under a tree for a while and relax before continuing the race. He made himself comfortable on a bed of pine needles and soon fell asleep. Meanwhile, the tortoise, knowing he couldn’t possibly beat the hare despite his bragging, also took his time, plodding on down the road even more slowly than usual.  “Why even try?” he thought.  “Me and my big mouth…” he muttered to himself.

Just as the tortoise came upon the hare, still asleep underneath the tree, a loud crack of thunder from a coming storm jarred the hare awake.  The hare, laughing as he saw the tortoise would still be easy to beat, jumped up and continued the race, beating the tortoise to the pond without even breaking a sweat.

When the tortoise finally reached the finish line, the forest animals all gathered round him.  They knew that he probably wouldn’t win, but they really wanted him to, because the hare was a big show off and they were sick and tired of him always talking about how fast he was.

They patted the tortoise on the back and said, “Thanks for trying.  You did great.”

“Oh, but I didn’t,” the tortoise said.  “I could have won that race,” he said, “but I was so sure I wouldn’t that I didn’t even try.  If only I had given it my all…”

“Oh don’t feel bad, Tortoise,” said Raccoon.  “Chances are good you still would have lost the race.”

“That may be true,” said Tortoise.  “But I would have lost it for good reasons…and I wouldn’t feel so bad about it all.”

Just then Owl flew down from a nearby tree and said, 
"Whoo…Whoo…Whoo wants to know the moral of the story?”

All the animals groaned.  Owl was always wanting to tell the moral.  “Go ahead, Owl,” said Raccoon.

Owl declared, “The moral of this story is Getting beaten by a hare is not as bad as getting beaten by yourself."

 

Meditation  “Assurance” by John Corrado[1]

Be gentle with yourself:

You’re okay.

Life has no erasers—but life is okay, too.

Don’t wait for forgiveness.

        The only forgiveness you get

        is that you take.

 

Don’t be afraid.

Have faith.

Say “yes” in spite of the

        temptation to say “no.”

 

Be a healer.

 

Address the world with wonder.

Engage it with courage:

        Daring love

        Daring trust.

        Daring hope.

 

Open your soul as if

        it were a window

Letting the sun shine in

        and letting the light of yourself out.

 

        You can do it.

        We can do it.

        So let’s do it!

 

        Amen!

 

Reading from the book Good to Great by business consultant and author Jim Collins.  He writes:

 

My wife, Joanne, began racing marathons and triathlons in the early 1980s. As she accumulated experience—track times, swim splits, race results—she began to feel the momentum of success.

One day, she entered a race with many of the best woman triathletes in the world, and—despite a weak swim where she came out of the water hundreds of places behind the top swimmers and having to push a heavy, non-aerodynamic bike up a long hill—she managed to cross the finish line in the top ten.

Then, a few weeks later while sitting at breakfast, Joanne looked up from her morning newspaper and calmly, quietly said, “I think I could win the Ironman.”

The Ironman, the world championship of triathlons, involves 2.4 miles of ocean swimming and 112 miles of cycling, capped off with a 26.2 mile marathon footrace on the hot, lava-baked Kona coast of Hawaii.

“Of course, I'd have to quit my job, turn down my offers to graduate school (she had been admitted to graduate business school at a number of the top schools), and commit to full-time training. But...”

Her words had no bravado in them, no hype, no agitation, no pleading. She didn't try to convince me. She simply observed what she had come to understand was a fact, a truth no more shocking than stating that the walls were painted white. She had the passion. She had the genetics. And if she won races, she'd have the economics….

And, so, she decided to go for it. She quit her job. She turned down graduate schools. She sold [her business]….  And three years later, on a hot October day in 1985, she crossed the finish line at the Hawaii Ironman in first place, world champion.

When Joanne set out to win the Ironman, she did not know if she would become the world's best triathlete. But she understood that she could, that it was in the realm of possibility, that she was not living in a delusion. And that distinction makes all the difference. It is a distinction that those who want to go from good to great must grasp, and one that those who fail to become great so often never do.[2]

 

Sermon

This time of year in the Midwest,

when the sun rides higher in the sky each day,

when a thaw breaks through the cold once or twice a week,

when the grass begins to make an appearance from under its white blanket, and ice patches melt into puddles on driveways and sidewalks by day, only to return to their frozen state by night,

when the wind carries the promise of a someday spring even as it smacks us in the face with its icy hands….

 

This time of year, I can’t avoid getting a nervous feeling in my stomach and experiencing some nervous twitching in my legs.  No, I don’t feel this way because we’re getting close to canvass time…

 

No, this time of year is when my sense memories of track season begin to kick in.

 

I ran on the track team for just two spring--8th and 9th grade only--but my recollections of those two seasons have stayed with me these nearly 30 years later, making a permanent imprint on my winter-into-spring psyche.

 

I think I remember track so vividly because I disliked it so much.

 

I didn’t want to run on the track team.  I did it because I thought I should.  I think I even remember telling myself “Mark, this will be good for you.”   I had tried out for the 8th grade basketball team and was the last person cut.  Seeing my disappointment, the 9th grade team coach suggested I run track instead.  He told me, running track would get me into shape, and maybe even improve my basketball skills for the following year’s tryouts.

 

My older brother had been a distance runner for his high school team and seemed to be enjoying it.  So I figured I, too, could give it a shot.

 

However, at my first track team practice, on a February afternoon, as my gangly teammates and I ran laps around the hallways of our junior high, a training exercise reserved for those still-winter days when running outside was not an option, I was reminded that I was not my brother.  I didn’t want to run.  I definitely didn’t want to practice.

 

Our coach was a former shot putter.  He didn’t know anything about training for the distance events, and so he let us coach ourselves. Knowing nothing about training for any sport, I decided to tag along with the school record-holder in the mile and 880, a nice, somewhat introverted guy named Don, who accepted my obvious need for help by quietly going about his routine, which, as far as I could tell, primarily consisted of running successive sprints of 400 yards…all afternoon.  I’m sure this was an effective way to train, but it was easy for me to abandon, because, well, it HURT!

 

Pain is hard enough to endure when we want to be doing something.  When we don’t, pain is a deal breaker.

 

I decided I would reserve my pain for the races themselves.

 

Soon, March had arrived, and with it the first of our track meets.  While I enjoyed seeing my friends compete in their events, I spent most of the afternoon dreading the start of mine.  The anticipation was always worse than the reality, though, for once the gun sounded for my first race, the mile, I knew that every step I took would carry me closer to the finish line.  

 

My basic race strategy didn’t change from meet to meet.  There was no need for me to keep up with the obviously faster runners, the ones like my teammate Don who sprang forward from the start, who ran like they really wanted to win.  No, I was OK with hanging back with the second tier runners, those who just might have been going through the motions, like me.

 

As I would make my way around the poorly maintained cinder tracks of our conference junior high schools, dressed in the simple, decade-old uniform previously worn by a succession of other gawky teenaged boys, the sounds of my breath and heartbeat filling my ears, I would tell myself things like, “Hold something back Mark.  Don’t wear yourself out too soon.  You’ve still got 3 laps to go….Hold something back, you’ve still got 2 laps….Hold something back you’ve still got 1 lap to go….”

 

The funny thing is, my first year on the team, this strategy worked well enough, at least according to my own limited expectations.  If a team was particularly thin in its distance competitors, I might even earn (?) an occasional third place finish, garnering a point for my team.   Before long, I would be back on the bus, headed home, listening to one of my teammates’ boombox blasting AC/DC.  I never cared much for AC/DC, but on the way home from another track meet, blessedly over, it was truly music to my ears.

 

I finished out my first season without much fanfare.  I enjoyed being around my teammates, and our team was moderately successful, due mostly to the performance of the 9th grade members, but I was delighted to see the season end all the same.

 

Even as I did not enjoy running track, I came back the next year to compete again in the distance events.  Why did I return to the team when my heart was clearly not in it?  I don’t know for sure.  Maybe it was the connection I had to my teammates.  Maybe it was the responsibility I felt to my coach, who encouraged me to return.  Maybe it was a nagging feeling I had that I needed to be there…that my participation might be teaching me something important about life.

 

Whatever the reason, I now found myself a senior member of the team, with eighth graders looking up to me, following my lead.  I can’t say I gave them much to follow.  I still didn’t care for practice, preferring to train by myself, which gave me the freedom to goof off.  I still clung to my race strategy of holding back, holding back, holding back…and I still was getting nowhere with it.

 

Our ragtag team was having a dismal season.  We were getting blown out of every meet.   Morale was low.  Even the AC/DC didn’t sound so good any more. 

 

But near the end of the season, something changed for me.  I think my responsibility for the team started to kick in.  Or maybe it was my responsibility to myself.

 

I remember well the track meet where the changed occurred.  Before my event, my teammates and I had been sizing up our competition when we learned that the best miler for the other team had just recuperated from having mono.  When he was healthy, he could have beaten our best times by a good margin.  But we knew that he might struggle.  Maybe we could steal a victory.  Their second best miler was definitely in my league.  At the very least, I should be able to get a third place finish.

 

The gun sounded the start of the race and I began my slow but steady run around the track, with my slow and steady monologue of “hold something back…hold something back…”.  Before I had finished the first turn, I started to cramp up, searing pain in my side that forced me to run even more slowly than usual.  My primary competition blazed ahead of me as I struggled to run through the cramp.  About midway through the race, my pain went away, but by this time, I was in fourth place by at least 200 yards.  I was so relieved to not feel the cramp any more, I decided to not hold back and do everything I could to catch up.  I could see that I was gaining, and so could my teammates who were cheering me on as I began the final lap, now only about 100 yards behind.  By the final turn of the final lap, I had made up all the distance and was now running even for third place.  My competitor seemed surprised to see me, but not so surprised that he couldn’t give a little extra effort from a reserve I no longer had left.  He beat me by at least three paces and that was that.

 

As I walked off my exhaustion, trying to catch my breath, my teammates congratulated me as though I had won the race.  My coach looked at me with astonishment…and respect.  And I discovered the exhilaration of giving it my all.  Now it was crystal clear that my strategy of holding back had been all wrong.  No, the better way to run a mile was to keep up with the competition, run each lap as its own race, and focus not on holding something back, but in giving more—more than you even think you can.

 

At the next track practice, I trained more intentionally.  I returned to the 400 yard sprints that my previous teammate Don had run.  And I encouraged my teammates to come with me.

 

The next meet, the last meet of my track career, I was ready like never before, which isn’t saying much.  Again, our competition was weak, but their track was not.  It was flat, and smooth, and bouncy even.  The weather was perfect.  When we lined up for the start of the mile, my monologue was not “Hold something back”.  My monologue was “This is it, Mark.  This is it.”

 

This race, I kept up with the competition.  I gave it my all, the whole way, not just the last lap.  As I approached the fourth and final time around the track, I could see a possible victory and I would not be denied.  I took the lead and never relinquished it.  Not only did I win the race, I ran the best time I ever had, by a considerable margin.

 

I felt great and foolish at the same time.  I felt great for the effort I had put forth and the results that had come with it.  I felt foolish for all the time I had spent holding back, not giving it my all, participating without the passion and commitment that would have enriched my experience and brought me more satisfaction than my holding back ever could.

 

I was reminded of this life lesson learned in junior high track when I was reading a passage by Buddhist monk Sakyong Mipham entitled “The Virtue of Exertion.” [3] Mipham writes of how we often think that happiness comes during the times when we are not exerting ourselves, when we are doing very little or taking on few responsibilities.  There are certainly times when taking it easy is necessary and rewarding.  We all need a break now and then.  However, Mipham reminds us that the true rewards come when we put forth effort toward what really matters to us, when we fully engage in the present moment of our reality without wishing it away or pushing it aside or merely going through the motions out of a sense of obligation, when we embrace the opportunity of our living with open arms and intentional action…action that is driven by our curiosity, our sense of possibility, and our gratitude for the opportunity of another day of living and loving, rather than simply obligation.

 

How many of us spend our waking hours yearning for release from whatever obligations we may have, maybe freedom from our responsibilities as parents, as partners, as employees, as students, or even as volunteers, when those responsibilities are, in reality, the places in our lives, however challenging they may be, where we can derive the most meaning…and, in turn, the most satisfaction?

 

How much time and energy do we spend dreading what we have to do, wishing our moments away in search of some imagined land of rest and relaxation that is rarely as attractive as it seems from afar?  I don’t want to oversimplify my point here.  Some of us do overwork, we can over commit ourselves and leave too little room in our lives for rest and renewal.  And some of us are just plain busy.  There are phases of our lives when there just isn’t enough time in a day to fully meet all our responsibilities, real or imagined. However, I’m thinking that if we spent as much time fully giving ourselves to the commitments we have chosen as the time we often spend trying to avoid those commitments or holding something back out of fear that our life resources are more limited than they usually are, we would find the renewal we need in the sense of satisfaction that comes from living those very commitments.

 

Taking us back to my track example, all the time I spent fretting over the race to come did nothing to improve my performance in the race itself, or my attitude afterwards.  I was so focused on just getting through it, that I couldn’t be fully present in it. 

 

My fear in building this sermon on the metaphor of a track competition is that I may give the impression that “winning” is the supreme goal…that we are only successful if we are better than someone else.  But I want to be clear that the kind of victory I am talking about today is not a victory over other people. It is a victory of our life’s possibilities over the assumed limitations we often carry with us.  No matter who we are or what we do, there will always be people who have abilities and accomplishments that exceed our own.  It’s like my instructor told me the first time I went skiing, “Mark,” he said, “there will always be people on the hill who are better than you and there will always be people who are worse than you.  Don’t worry about them.  Just get down the hill the best you can.”

 

“Just get down the hill the best you can.”

 

My point today is that we can get down the hill with the monologue of “hold something back…hold something back” or we can get down the hill with the monologue of “This is it.  This is it.”  Which serves us better in the end?

 

I am especially interested in the difference between “hold something back” and “this is it” as we head into the time of our annual canvass, a time when members and friends of our church are asked to consider the intersection of their generosity and commitment to this congregation and the church’s financial needs.  As Heidi told us earlier, on March 29th we will all gather for one Sunday service at Drake University, a time for all of us to be together at one time to celebrate this church and make our pledges for the coming year.  As we lead up to that very important morning just over a month from now, we need to talk some about money.  Most of us aren’t used to talking about money and so we can be uncomfortable doing so.  In my nearly eight years as your minister, I have rarely talked about money from the pulpit.  I suppose I was working under the assumption that people will give what they give and who am I to suggest that they give more.  But I can see now that my hesitancy to discuss money with you had more to do with me, than with you.  My hesitancy had more to do with my own discomfort, my own fear, my own desire hold something back, to not have to talk about money and to focus instead on how we interact with one another and with the world we share.

 

But how we choose to share our resources with our religious community, this sacred place where we are encouraged to live our lives to the fullest, to grow our souls and do our part to build a better world, is entirely about how we interact with one another and with the world we share.  

 

Some of you participated in the recent survey of our members and friends that was put together by our growth team.  The results were very positive.  Sure there were some areas where we could improve, particularly in our approach to religious education, which isn’t surprising considering the upheaval in that area of church life we have experienced over the past two years.  One of the most interesting results was that, of the 169 respondents, more than half believed that our congregation is not visible enough in the community.  What is keeping us from being more visible?  I suggest the primary reason, collectively speaking, is that we are holding back.  We are holding back from fully inhabiting our responsibilities as members and friends of this congregation to spread the word about who we are and what we do here.  We are holding back from believing that excellence is possible.  We are holding back from contributing all we could to making that excellence a reality.

 

I don’t know about you, but I drive around this town and I get annoyed at the fancy buildings and programs of some of the more exclusionary churches.  Why do they have so much money?  What is it about what they offer that compels their members to give so much?  Is our vision of life any less important than theirs?  What would it take for us to embrace our mission and vision of a better world enough to give similar amounts? 

 

During my sabbatical last spring, when I visited other growing vibrant UU congregations, I could see that for our church to make the leap from “good to great” would require more and better staffing.  So a group of us have been working since my return on creating a staffing plan that fits not only who we are today, but who we say we want to be tomorrow. We have hired a professional director of finance and administration, with skills and experiences that exceed anything we have had in that position before.  We have hired a talented communication coordinator, who is anxious to help us improve our church communications.  And we will soon be hiring a full-time director of religious education to help us as we continue to pursue excellent programming for our children and youth.  We have increased the hours of our energetic membership coordinator, Lori Emison Clair, who has been spearheading lots of new initiatives and events, including the ever-expanding Wednesday night dinner and programming.  And we are hoping to hire an office assistant to give our staff a reliable go-to person for administrative support.  All of these positions and improvements are indispensable for our continued institutional health and growth, but they will require a significant increase in our annual pledge income. 

 

From where I stand, this is a pivotal moment for this congregation.  A time when we can hold something back and stay where we are (at best) or a time when we can say “this is it!”  and embrace the possibilities waiting for us and this church we care so much about.

 

Earlier this week I met with a dozen folks considering membership, people who have found us amidst all the other options for religious community and who see in us the promise of something better, something meaningful and meaning-filled, a community of tolerance, possibility and transformation.  I saw in their faces and questions the same curiosity and yearning for excellence that I felt when I first joined a UU congregation.  But no one explained to me the costs of that excellence and it’s taken me almost this long to figure it out.

 

I don’t want to make that same mistake with you.

 

The costs of excellence are that each of us who calls this congregation home needs to consider making a pledge between 3 and 5 percent of our household income.  Not everyone will reach that goal…even those who really want to. I know the economy is not doing well and that some of us may be struggling or fearful. But that’s why a percentage gift is the way to go.  A percentage gift is the way to be fair to yourself and to your fellow members and friends, some of whom stretch to support this congregation more than you might believe. Isn’t the mission and vision of our church important enough for us to pursue and encourage this level of generosity? 

 

Even if our per-member giving averaged only 2.5% of our household income, we would more than exceed our goals.  Just think of what would be possible if we went beyond that?

 

I’m tired of holding something back.  I’m tired of people not knowing who we are.  I am tired of us going through the motions.  I want us to be present and accounted for in our mission.  I want us to be known not for our membership total but for our per-member giving and generosity.  This is the time.  This is the time for us to own and live the promise of this place by mentoring for our newcomers and those who will follow them what it means to be a community of abundance, a community that cares enough about what we claim to believe that we want to invite others to join us and to fund our efforts accordingly.

 

Now is the time.

 

Our generosity will do more than pay for staffing and programming and outreach.  Our generosity will literally change lives.  Including our own.

You can do it.

We can do it.

So let’s do it!

 

 



[1] 73 Voices, Christopher Raible and Edward Darling, eds. (Boston: UUA, 1972),  p. 15)

[2] Jim Collins, Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap…and Others Don’t (New York: HarperCollins Books, 2001), 116-117.

[3] Sakyong Mipham, Ruling Your World, (New York: Broadway Books, 2005), pp. 66-71.